I put on the noise cancel. I think I’ll choose RAIN. It’ll soothe the most. Then I’ll illustrate.
Does the sound of nature help. The swirling feels like its gone. Some times my perception changes. Like going into third person, or perhaps feel like I’m plugged directly into this wild screen.
I think this is all too much for me.
Can I continue to do this?
Should I shift my focus? Yes, focus. I need to focus. Why can’t I focus. One word: focus. I’ve found something. Focus. A word. Aha. Focus. Its helping me stay on track. Is it the word focus, or is it the meaning of its words? Focus. There it is. Lets test.
Shiver. Dark……oh? It made me shiver. Feeling that darkness. The word I shift to. Shiver. Pulling a new train of thought. SHIVER! It pulls me to the now. The words matter. So what word should I focus on.
Are these actually my thoughts or am I someone else?
Weird. Not something I would think of.
Can drugs allow someone else to come forward in your place?
No. no no. that sounds forced buddy. Chill out.
Go play a game ffs. But what game? Idk, stop talking to yourself.